Ah, i should be sleeping
I hate it. (You shouldn’t read this sentence that fast). I hate it. (Pause, now taste what i say, slowly, don’t rush). I hate who i am. I hate what i do to my life.
My life is a common victim of my insanity, and is there a mathematical expression to it, it isn’t 2πr, even when i think my life is a big wheel that goes round and round like a big wheel. And in each miraculous lap, (and miraculous means miraculously, it still goes round and round), it collects dust and ashes and doesn’t leave any trail for others to follow its path — simply because my life is a big spinning wheel which does not move the vehicle, and the vehicle (assuming that i have a slightly big tummy, no mater what i do to my life, or didn’t) is a giant bad robot whose legs are made of wooden wheels and hands made of its legs, and legs made of its hands (it goes round and round, don’t you remember?) and its wooden wheels are powered by its weak heart. And its weak heart is made of a powerful garbage bin.
It’s weird isn’t it?
It’s a garbage way to modify a noun into an adjective, like garbage noun into garbage adjective, or to write like this, but is there a mathemetical expression to express how i hate who i am and what i do to my life, there will be a lot of negative numbers, and if you sum all these negative numbers, you obtain a new negative number that will auto sum itself into zero.
It’s weird isn’t it?
Arithmetically, my nonsensical life, — challenging even –, is not made of a garbage bin or negative sets of wooden wheels or its slightly big tummy. I do not know what my life is made of. One thing for sure, it’s not the life of mine that i hate, but my own self and what i do to it.
I didn’t do enough to maintain a good life. I didn’t do enough to maintain good friendships, i didn’t do enough for myself and the people whom i care about. And the people whom i care about is what keeps both me alive and dead.
In the hotel room in Singapore, i wonder if i should sleep and die tomorrow, or jump off the window and walk away alive the next day.
I’ve eaten a cup of instant noodle and a bun alone by the road, haven’t i my dear?
Ah, i should be sleeping.
the windows can’t be opened :S
hehe. yeah, i guess.
how u been dude. feels like long time haven’t met you although i think we just met in sg. lol